Seeing Yourself

Distortion

I believe we can never see ourselves the way we truly are. We only ever see a distorted fraction. In the mirror we see a flipped, single faceted side of ourselves. In a photo, we see a one-dimensional reflection. In a video we may see more of the truth, but it is often so different from the image we have built up over decades of seeing ourselves in the mirror at least once a day and hearing our voices from inside our heads, that a recording seems so alien it becomes difficult to connect to it.

We never get to actually be present with ourselves. To see ourselves from continuously changing angles like another human being would. To observe the way we move, walk and carry ourselves. To witness our energy and its manifestations on our outer appearances.

I remember once walking up to a crossing. In front of me, waiting by the traffic light, there was a girl about my age, and just behind her was a guy obviously admiring her. She was not aware of this because she didn’t look back, but the guy clearly thought she was worth a thorough look. How often are people looking at us with even a hint of admiration, let alone wonder? We will never know.

A few years ago, a friend I had studied with took her own life. From her social media posts it was clear that she didn’t like the way she looked. All I ever saw was a beautiful, warm, kind girl with a gorgeous, radiant smile. We never see ourselves the way we are.

Self-Image

So why do we cling so hard to the image we see in the mirror when it is only a distorted fraction of the truth? I think once that fact really sinks in, we can learn to be a little more free form this image we hold onto so tightly. We can decide what we want to show up as in this world. If you want to be elegant there’s much more of that in movement and speech than there is in outer appearances. If you want to be handsome you need to be confident in your heart, because a person who only concerns themselves with the beauty of their shell will only look handsome in photographs.

So here is an invitation to think about the qualities you want to step into. To connect with your own radiance instead of thinking having a different nose would make you beautiful. To be mindful of your thoughts as they manifest in the world, even if you can’t always detect it in a photo or even the mirror.